Single with kids...

I was speaking to my best friend a few weeks ago and we were talking about me attempting to date while being a single parent of a tween and a teen.  I was explaining to her about me going out sometimes and leaving the kids home because they are of a age where I feel comfortable with them being home alone for a few hours.  My best friend attempting to give me the best "advise" she could basically told me that I need to just concentrate on my children and not to worry about dating until they both were out of the house because it would have an effect on them.  Hmmm.  I beg to differ on so many levels. 

DO I HAVE TO PUT MY LOVE LIFE ON HOLD BECAUSE I AM A SINGLE PARENT?

I personally don't think so.    I think there can be a healthy balance between my parenthood life and my dating life. 

One thing I know for sure is my children DO NOT have to meet every man I date, especially when I am just casually dating...  I am NOT LOOKING for a husband off the back so it is not necessary for them to meet every single man...  Plus, how would that appear to them on my behalf? 

Another thing to note is my children have active extracurricular schedules.  Band, basketball, and friends so they are never tide strickley to the house all the time.  If I made them stay in the house all the time while I go out partying and such I believe they would start to have ill feelings.

What are your thoughts?  Are you currently in this type of situation?  How do you handle it?

Peace and Blessings.

Another mini-vacation....

So if you have been reading my blog for a while you know I am passionate about my mini-vacations.  So this weekend I will be traveling to California for the Party in Palm Springs.  This is an annual event and this will be my 3rd time attending.  I like this event because it is a mature crowd and we all have a great time. 

It is also a good way for me to get out of my comfort zone of my east coast home town.  Of course as always I will post some pictures of the trip once I am back and settled in...  I hope all is well with you...


Peace and Blessings....

How I deal with love...

I attempt to be transparent most of the time in this blog as I want to be able to relate to the people who choose to read it.  So for the last few months I have been hanging out with this man.  We have no title, we are just friends.  Unfortunately, the timing has been off as far as where I am in my relationship goals and where he is...  I decided to hang out with him because at the time of our introductions I wasn't attached and I was craving the company of someone.  He fell right into place.  The friendship has been amazing. 

Without all the complications of having a title (boyfriend/girlfriend) I have allowed this friendship to develop naturally and I find myself loving this man.  Technically I do love him based on the definition:

love (noun)


1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.


2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.


3. sexual passion or desire.

Now how do I deal with this since we have clearly defined our friendship as just a friendship?  It is difficult.  Love is a strong and powerful emotion.  It can make me vulnerable and open to get emotional hurt, especially when the feeling isn't mutual.  I am just going to continue to go with the flow and keep telling myself that we are just friends.
 
Oh well just some early morning ramblings...
 
Peace and Blessings

Is love overrated???

Is love overrated? I mean it feels good but hurts like hell. Is the good feeling worth the pain? One minute your laughing and cuddling and the next your crying and hurting. Is love overrated?

Entitlement...

According to www.marriam-webster.com entitlement is belief that one is deserving of or entitled to certain privileges.

Today I come to you to discuss why some people think they have entitlement with me.  The one and only cause of this is because of me being so accommodating and pretty much almost always saying yes.  I fully take the blame to such sense of entitlement from some people.  The good thing about it on my part is that I have full control of reversing this sense of entitlement.  It may not feel good to the party receiving at first and may indeed have adverse affects on my relationships or friendships but like I have said before I am the only one who is in FULL control of my happiness. 

So me telling an friend or associate "No" doesn't mean I love you any less than I did before.  What it does mean is I love myself just a little more and no longer will be taken for granted or advantage of...  It's that simple. 

Peace and Blessings...  

Weekend Birthday Get-A-Way...

This past weekend I decided to take my self on a mini get-a-way for my birthday...  I recently started a job with a new company so I can't take any vacation time yet...  I am limited to weekends so I decided to take myself to the Grandover Resort in Greensboro, NC.  It is not a far drive in my opinion and an ex-boyfriend introduce the place to me a while ago...

It is good to get a little secluded from outside distractions at times as I was starting to feel a little overwhelmed with being a mother and helping my family out.  During this weekend I scheduled myself a 50 min massage and a 50 min pedicure... What an amazing experience...

I also got in my car and wandered around Greensboro until I found the downtown area and ended up at the International Civil Rights Center & Museum.  I had no intentions of taking the tour but found myself compelled to do so.  That was probably the best decision I had made the whole weekend.  Although the museum wasn't robust with artifacts and such it was definitely surreal...  I would recommend that museum to anyone who ask and if I could remember the name of the tour guide I would surely make sure you got her because she was so full of energy and knowledge...  And she made sure you knew she is and AGGIE alumnae.  I don't know how many times she chanted "AGGIE PRIDE" during that tour... LOL

Most of the people who know me well know I am a loner.  I needed this weekend so much...  It gave me some time to reflect on a few things and get motivated again about this blog and some other projects I have been working on. 




Until next time, peace and blessings...

Embracing the things I have no control over...

I often use this blog as a way of venting about my single life.  I am embracing it and pretty much okay with being single.  Not ALL days are good ones but most of them are.  Lately I have really embraced the fact that I really have no control over my current relationship status.  All I can do is continue to be open to a relationship happening and eventually it will. 

I think to often we (singles) go on this journey of "finding" someone.  So it is almost like we set off on this journey searching for this person that meets some type of requirements we have set.  I have to honestly say for me it does not work out to well.  I would rather fall into a relationship with someone and it be unexpected.  In my opinion if it happens naturally then it is possible that person is meeting most of your expectations without you having to check off your requirements document. 

I find that I will gravitate to that one individual who is meeting those expectations and eventually not being open enough to allow someone else to enter in.  The transition from friendship to relationship shouldn't be difficult I believe.  If you are someone who peaks my interest enough to keep me focused on you then you just may be the winner in this rat race... LOL

Thanks for reading,
Peace and Blessings

BTW: My birthday is in 4 days!!!  :)